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September 05, 2005
Volume 6, Issue 5
Happy Labor Day, end of summer and all that.
Today's theme is:
Hot dogs
Ted: The Magic Cookout
Everyone remembers where they were when Jonny Crabcake came to town. I was seven, playing tag with the guys, when we smelled the wonderful aroma. In backyards across town, hundreds of folks stopped what they were doing and turned as one. That scent drew us right to Hot Dog park, where the big statue of Oscar Meyer used to stand. There we found Jonny, with a big pot hung over an open flame, tossing crabcakes into boiling oil. He gave us a new life that day. No more slaves to the typical cookout would we be. Heed his lessons well.
Michele: Ode to a Weenie
i think that i shall never eat
a substance more devoid of meat
than the hot dog i ate last night
but damn, i did eat every bite.hot dogs are the food of gods
despite the arteries they clog
in the oven, on the grill
floating in a watery swill
mustard (yellow), sauerkraut
that's what summer is all about
pile them high upon the plates
don't talk to me about nitratesno turkey, tofu, chicken filler
real meat hot dogs are what's killer
so please don't call me a big ol' meanie
when i won't share my all-beef weenie.
Laurence - Excuses
Every July Fourth, there's some kind of hot dog eating contest at Coney Island. Some skinny Japanese guy always wins, which is why they think five full-sized adults can fit into one of their cars, I guess.
I can't eat animal fats anymore due to a crash diet my doctor came up with. This is why I buy the big Super Star Dogs at Minutemaid Park - they hold the most condiments like relish or mustard and onions.
Those vegetables are healthy right?
And I swear it's not my fault that someone put meat in between them and the bun.