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August 08, 2005
Volume 5, Issue 8
Today's theme is a picture...
Laurence - Game show
In his hideout, Ayman Al-Zarqawi pouted.
"They love the Hezbollah and Hamas," he grumbled. "The parades. The diplomacy. The material support. Why not me and my resistance fighters?"
That's when Wheel of Fortune came on the television, and the idea hit Zaraquawi like a brick.
It's a blend of People's Court and Wheel of Fortune. Collaborators and sinners confess their crimes against Islam, the Sharia judge finds them guilty, and they spin The Wheel.
Most of it says "BEHEADING."
Know what's sick? "AMPUTATION" actually brings relief and joy to the condemned.
And even sicker, it'll be on CBS soon.
Ted: Recruiting
This is the third time today that some midwest hick has tried to get "one more spin pleeeeeeease."
The noise is killing me, the lights are ruining my eyes, I haven't seen the sun in weeks, and I'm starting to get another tic.
Why don't I leave? Hell, if I tried, one of Vinnie's torpedos would be on me before I got off the strip. If I was lucky. They kill ya hard if you make 'em work for it.
I give Vinnie the signal, he nods, so I let her spin again. The vig is gonna kill her though.