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August 02, 2005
Volume 5, Issue 2
King Fahd of Saudi Arabia is dead. Crown Prince Abdullah is the new king.
The theme for the day is the word crown.
Laurence - Empty is the head that wears the crown
My theory about Jughead is that he's really a member of the Royal Family, smuggled into Riverdale to protect the royal bloodline from extinction in the event of an emergency.
This makes sense if you consider that Jughead first appeared in Archie Comics in 1941. England was in danger of falling to Hitler, so hiding a Royal in America would make perfect sense.
Even though this explains the crown, this doesn't explain his lack of an accent. However, through intense brainwashing sessions and the proper application of high voltages to his genitals, anything is possible.
Heck, just look at Sting.
Ted: Two Crowns
"Two crowns," said the inn keeper as he handed me a plate. The plate held three game hens, fresh vegetables, an apple, my room key, and a note.
"Two crowns? Is it that troubled here?"
"Indeed sir. Even for a good King's man like yourself. The farmers are being burned out by the rebels."
"The note?"
"A woman came two days ago and said you would be coming. A real Lady she was."
It must be from the princess.
King's Man,
You or someone just like you is about to be poisoned. Don't eat the apple. Kill the rebel innkeeper.